Sometimes real life is stranger than fiction.

First we have a man carrying a dead weasel being accused of assault. The victim asked, “Why are you carrying a weasel?” Police said the attacker answered, “It’s not a weasel, it’s a marten,” then punched him in the nose, dropped the carcass, and fled.

Up next, a friend of mine volunteers at her local rehab shelter where she meets all kinds of used and abused women.  This tale is one that actually happened… it’s a tale of ” redneck lovin’ ” to use the abused woman’s words (we’ll call her Marylou) as an example of how her ex-husband treated her.

Marylou used to be a housewife. One Christmas, she received two gifts from her husband: a toaster and a dildo. She gave him a confused look and that’s when he said to her, “If you don’t like the toaster, you can go fuck yourself.”

Last up, we have Titanic II sinks on maiden voyage.

Most people would think twice before buying a boat named Titanic II. And sure enough, when Briton Mark Wilkinson took the 4.8-metre cabin cruiser out for its maiden voyage, it promptly sank. “If it wasn’t for the harbourmaster, I would have gone down with the Titanic,” Mr Wilkinson, who had to be fished out of the sea at West Bay harbour in Dorset, southern England, told local media. One eyewitness said: “It wasn’t a very big boat – I think an ice cube could have sunk it!”